Wasting Time...

So, I had my classroom observation last week and my post-ob conference was today.  As I imagined, it was a total waste of time.  I must say that my kids are extremely well-bahaved, so whever I get observed, that helps a lot.  I can pretty much predict their behavior, who's going to participate, and who's going to zone out, so I already know how to gear that particular moment of teaching.  This time was no different.  When I met with her for my post-ob, something just felt off though.  I don't know if I'm just different because I know I'm done, but it felt that she was wanting to make plans for things that won't happen.  I tried to humor her, but honestly, I'm not sure what she expected from me.  Anyway, I'm happy to report that I have about another week and a half of work until I'm done.  I plan on sending out a letter to my classroom parents this Friday letting them know that I will not be returning after Christmas break.  I don't anticipate that I'll have too much drana, and I hope I'm right.

Speaking about wastes of times, there's something that's been on my mind about a friend, but I'm not sure if I'm being judgemental.  I have a friend that's been TTC for about 4-5 years already.  At first I didn't know they were having trouble, but after being on TB, 4-5 can definitely be classifie as TTTC.  Since I met her through another friend and I was still a little guarded about our own TTTC, I wasn't as open as I could've been to her.  Anyway, as time went on, she and I started talking on our own and really opened up to each other about our struggles.  After talking to her several times, I realized just how fortunate J and I are to have such great IF coverage under his insurance.  My friend has ZERO coverage, meaning that all of their appointments, treatments, procedures, etc. are 100% out-of-pocket (OOP).  Honestly, I felt bad and I felt extremely helpless.  I almost wish that just like I donated my meds to someone, I could donate some of my IF coverage to her.  It makes me so sad that couple struggling to build their families are held back by their finances, when there are so many parasites that won't stop reproducing and pawning off their financial responsibilities on the system.

I would never think that trying to have a baby is a waste of time but in her situation, I wonder if the way she's going about it is counterproductive.  What do I mean?  Well, my friend and her husband decided to move forward with IUI just like we did.  The difference is that unlike J and I, they are not having ANY monitoring appointments.  They did not have any u/s, bloodwork, or anything other than Clomid and the actual IUI.  This scares me...a lot.  First, Clomid is not candy; Clomid can cause cysts, overstimulate your ovaries, and thin out your uterine lining to the point that even if the egg was fertilized, implantation could be jeopardized.  Second, without proper monitoring, even if you're "regular" in your cycles, you won't know exactly when it's time for ovulation.  Having an IUI too soon or too late after ovulation is kind of pointless because in either instance, there is no egg to fertilize.  You have either missed the egg and it's gone or it hasn't matured yet, so it will not be fertilized.

This is where I wonder if the way she's going about her treatment is a waste of time.  I'm not judging, I'm truly and honestly wondering if her efforts are worthwhile.  Sure, if the IUI were to work, then it's all good!  Even though she won't necessarily be educated on the "right" way to handle a medicated/IUI cycle, she'll have her beautiful baby.  If it doesn't work however, then is she just creating more heartbreak for herself?  I mean, I've been there.  I did like 3 unmonitored cycles with Clomid and honestly, those BFNs were even more heartbreaking to me because the hope that Clomid would do something was there.  It wasn't until I became educated on the risks/benefits of Clomid and really had a chance with proper treatment that I understood the need for monitoring to give myself the optimum chance to get pregnant.  By the way, my friend's first IUI didn't work, which makes wonder how effective her course of treatment really is.  I hope that sooner or later everything will just work out for her...